Romance and the Workplace

Posted on February 14, 2006

Office romances often end up causing unwanted attention, gossip, controversy and conflicts of interest. Simply Fired is running a contest to find the "funniest, saddest, most outrageous story" about love in the workplace. Prizes include a trip to Vegas, an Apple iPod Nano, or a SimplyFired t-shirt. The contest opens February 14th 2006 and runs through the end of March.

Simply Fired also conducted a "love in the workplace" study with Harris Interactive. They released this list of "tips" that includes some of the results from the survey.

Know the rules
Before even entertaining the thought of wooing a co-worker, check your company's employee handbook. If the rules say no inter-office dating and you want to keep your job, keep your thoughts -- and your hands -- to yourself.
Survey says: 35% of U.S. adults have fantasized about a co-worker.

Know your co-worker
Get to know your co-worker before pursuing a romantic relationship. Make sure s/he's single, not one to kiss and tell, and most importantly, not related to your boss.
Survey says: 6% of U.S. adults have dated a relative of a co-worker.

No means no.
She Loves You Not? If you ask a co-worker out and she/he says no, that's it. Game over, do not pass go. Do not ask again, do not sulk, do not make further references to the encounter, jokes or innuendos, Clarence.
Survey says: 16% of U.S. men and 5% of U.S. women say they've been rejected by a co-worker.

Create a workplace prenup
Before moving forward in a relationship, have a candid conversation about what might happen if things go south. Be aware of any potential consequences to your career before starting a relationship and agree on boundaries and expectations.
Survey says: 5% of U.S. adults said they've had romantic relations with a co-worker that made work uncomfortable.

Don't fish in your boss's pond
If your new "love bunny" works in the same department as you do, be prepared to change departments or tell your boss.

Date up, not down
If you have a choice, it's always safer dating someone above you. You may get fired, but at least you won't get slapped with a sexual harassment suit. And on that note...tempting as it may be, stay clear of temps. Contractors, consultants, and interns can all spell trouble, Mr. President. Just because they don't work for your company full-time doesn't mean that the rules of the game are any different when it comes to dating these folks (at least while they're under your roof).
Survey says: 7% of U.S. men and 11% of U.S. women have dated a boss or superior.

Keep your privates private
Don't gab about your new romance. Love in the workplace becomes dangerous when it's out in the open for others to scrutinize. No flirting, furtive glances in the elevator or taps on the derriere. People catch on to these cues.
Survey says: 9% of U.S. adults said they've had romantic relations with a co-worker that resulted in office gossip

Use Hotmail for hot mail
This may seem obvious, but plenty of people disregard it. Never use company email to exchange love notes or anything remotely suggestive. Companies can and do monitor email exchanges. If you must profess your undying affection while at work, use a private web-based email service like Yahoo or Hotmail.

Don't drink and date
Be wary of office parties and more than 2 drinks. Too many careers have been killed when people have dropped their guard at an office party.

Your Office or Mine? Neither.
C'mon people, get a room. Don't have sex or "sexual relations" in the office. Period.
Survey says: 16% of U.S. men and 7% of U.S. women reported having sex in the office.

The percentages are all pretty low so it sounds like most people wisely avoid office romances.