Conan O' Brien's Monologue at the White House Correspondents Dinner
Posted on April 28, 2013Conan O'Brien gave a very funny monologue at the 2013 White House Correspondents Dinner last night at the Hilton in Washington, D.C. He poked fun at the president and the media. Here are some of his best quips:
-On job creation since reelection: "The President is hard at work creating jobs. Since he was first elected, the number of popes has doubled, and the number of Tonight Show hosts has tripled."
-On the unusual guests invited to the dinner: "Duck Dynasty are here! Which can only mean one thing: The guys from Storage Wars said 'No.'"
-On how the dinner works: "If the President laughs, everyone laughs. And if the Fox News table laughs, a little girl just fell off her bike."
-On The Huffington Post: "I see the Huffington Post has a table. If you're here, who's covering Miley Cyrus' latest nip slip?"
-On tv news demos: "Fox News is watched by conservatives, MSNBC is watched by liberals. CNN is watched by the people who clean the offices at CNN."
-On CNN's ratings slide: "Now when the logo comes up, James Earl Jones says, "You're watching CNN?!?!'"
-On CNN hiring Piers Morgan: "They replaced the popular Larry King with one of the scheming footmen from Downton Abbey."
[In part 2] -How the news media is like high school: "Fox is the jocks. MSNBC is the nerds. Bloggers are the goths. NPR is the table for kids with peanut allergies. Al Jazeera is the weird foreign exchange student nobody talks to. Print media, you're the poor kid who died sophomore year in a car crash. Cheer up, we dedicate the yearbook to you!"